Beautiful Union Study Guide: A Practical Companion for Deep Reflection, Good Conversation, and Tough Questions You Really Want to Ask (2023)

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BeautiruLUNioNSTUDYGUIDEAllScripturequotations,unlessotherwiseindicated,aretakenfromtheESV®Bible(TheHolyBible,EnglishStandardVersion®),copyright©2001byCrossway,apublishingministryofGoodNewsPublishers.Usedbypermission.Allrightsreserved.Scripturequotationsmarked(N1v)aretakenfromtheHolyBible,NewInternationalVersion®,NIV®.Copyright©1973,1978,1984,2011byBiblicaInc.™UsedbypermissionofZondervan.Allrightsreservedworldwide.(www.zondervan.com).The“NIV”and“NewInternationalVersion”aretrademarksregisteredintheUnitedStatesPatentandTrademarkOfficebyBiblicaInc.™Copyright©2023byJoshuaRyanButlerAllrightsreserved.PublishedintheUnitedStatesbyMultnomah,animprintofRandomHouse,adivisionofPenguinRandomHouseLLC.MurtnoMaH®anditsmountaincolophonareregisteredtrademarksofPenguinRandomHouseLLC.ThisworkisbasedonanddirectlyquotesfromBeautifulUnionbyJoshuaRyanButler,firstpublishedintradepaperbackbyMultnomah,animprintofRandomHouse,adivisionofPenguinRandomHouseLLC,NewYork,in2023,copyright©2023byJoshuaRyanButler.TradePaperbackISBN9780593445051EbookISBN9780593445068TheCataloging-in-PublicationDataisonfilewiththeLibraryofCongress.waterbrookmultnomah.comCoverdesign:JessieSaywardBrightCoverartwork:©MirageC/GettyImagesep_prh_6.0_143667513_c0_rlStudyXY

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ContentsCoverTitlePageCopyrightTakingNotesHowtoUseThisGuidePartI:SexasIconIntroduction:BeautyandMysteryChapter1:SexasSalvationPartII:TheBeautyofSexChapter2:WhySunsetsAreBeautifulChapter3:Lover,Beloved,LovePartIII:LoveandLifeChapter4:WeddingonaMountainChapter5:BracetoBeBornPartIV:UnionandDiversityChapter6:CivilWarAmputeesChapter7:TheGreatExchangePartV:WhenGodSaysNoChapter8:SexIsn’tCheapChapter9:CheatingonGodChapter10:WelcometheChildren

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PartVI:AGreaterVisionChapter11:SplittingtheAdamChapter12:TriuneSymphonyPartVII:TriuneTempleChapter13:ARiverRunsThroughItChapter14:RoyalWeddingChapter15:TheEndoftheWorldFinalThoughtsNotes

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TakingNotesWhenyouseethepenciliconabove,youmaywanttofilloutyouranswersonaseparatepieceofpaperorusetheNotesfunctionalityonyoureReader.Ifyouareusingatouch-screenreaderorapp,simplyholdyourfingeroverthefirstwordinthelineandthenselect“Note”tocreateanoteandbegintypingyouranswer.Ifyouareusinganon-touch-screenreader,moveyourcursoruptothelinewhereyouwanttoenterananswerandthenbegintypingtocreateanewnote.YoucanthenreferenceyouranswersanytimeyouarereadingtheeBookastheywillbestoredasnotesonyourdevice.

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How10UseTHisGuiDeSexisdesignedtopointtogreaterthings.Big,beautifulthings.That’sthemessageattheheartofBeautifulUnion:exploringhowGod’svisionforsexpointsustothegood,unlocksthetrue,and(sortof)explainseverything.Thisvisionisforyou,whetheryou'resingleormarried,youngorold—whateveryourlifecircumstances.ForinChrist,thesegranderrealitiesareofferedtousall.ThisstudyguideisdesignedtohelpyoudivemoredeeplyintothekeyconceptsofBeautifulUnion:toreflectonthemandmakethemyourown,tocreativelyexploretheirsignificancefromfreshnewangles,todiscussthoseconceptswithothersorjournalontheirimplicationsforyourlife,andtointegrateGod’sbeautifulvisionintotheintricacyofyourownlifeandcircumstances.ThisguideisacompaniontothebookBeautifulUnion,anditcanbeusedindividuallyoringroups(suchasbookclubs,discussiongatherings,andotherkindsofsmallgroups).Whenyouusethisguidealongsidethebook,itwillhelpyou—andyourgroup,ifyou’reapartofone—togetthemostoutofthecontent.Theguideisdividedintosevensessions,witheachsessioncoveringtwoorthreechapters(calledmini-sessions)fromBeautifulUnion.Eachmini-sessionincludesabriefre-introductiontothechapterfollowedbythesamebasiccomponents:UnpackIt,UseYourImagination,andReflectonIt.(Moreoneachcomponentbelow.)

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Althoughthisguideisdividedintosevensessions,goatyourownpace.Ifyou’reusingthisbookinagroupstudy,thenitmightworkbestasaseven-weekstudywithparticipantsreadingandreflectingonafewchapterseachweek.Oryourgroupmaydecidetostretchitouttoafourteen-weekstudy.Dowhatworksbestforyourscheduleandtimeline.ReadingScheduleforBeautifulUnionIfyouhaven’talreadyreadthebookBeautifulUnion,dosoasyouworkyourwaythroughthesesessions:Session1IntroandChapter1Session2Chapters2-3Session3Chapters4-5Session4Chapters6-7Session5Chapters8-10Session6Chapters11-12Session7Chapters13-15UnpackItHereyou’llencounterquestionsdesignedtohelpyourecap,unpack,andcementkeyinsightsfromeachchapter.Usethisspacetorecordimportanttakeaways,makingthemyourown,soyoucaneasilyreturntothemlater.UseYourImaginationThesecreativeexercisesaredesignedtohelpyoureflect,usingyourimaginationinunexpectedways,onabigideafromthechapter.Theseworkbestwhenyoudon’trushthroughthem,sosetasidetentofifteenminutes,

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ideally,foreachexercise.Taketimetoletyourimaginationexploretheexerciseandjournalyourreflections.ReflectonItTheseexercisesareintendedtoguideyouinreflectingonthesignificanceofacentralideainyourownlifeandwhatitmightmeanorlookliketoliveinlightofthesebig,beautifulrealitiesyou’reexploringinthebook.GroupLeadersIfyou’recompletingthisstudyinagroupsettingandyou’rethefacilitatorofyourgroup,herearesomesimpleguidelinesthatcanhelpmakethisgroupjourneythroughBeautifulUnionmorerewarding.Eachsessionhasenoughcontentforsixtytoninetyminutesofgrouptime,dependingonhowlongyourgrouplikestospendindeeperdiscussionofeachtopic.Ifyou'repartofanestablishedsmallgroupgoingthroughBeautifulUnion,yourgroupisprobablyfamiliarwithhowtoreviewcontentinworkbooksandstudiessimilartothisone.Itmaynotbenecessarytoprescribeeverydetailofthegroupmeetings,thoughthisbriefrefreshermayhelpyouprepareforthegroup’sdiscussion.ReviewandPrayBeforemeetingwiththegroup,readthechaptersofBeautifulUnionassociatedwiththeupcomingsession(seethereadingscheduleonthispage)andcompletethemini-sessions.Thenprayforeachpersoninyourgroupandforyourtimetogether.GroupMembers

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EncourageeverygroupmembertoreadtheassignedchaptersofBeautifulUnionandcompletethesectionsinthisguidebeforetheyarriveatthemeetingseachweek.GettingStartedandIntroductionOnceyourgroupmembershavearrived,settleintoaplacefreeofdistractionswhereyoucansitcomfortablyforthenexthour.Then,whenyou’rereadytogetstarted,askagroupmembertoreadthemini-session’sintroductionaloud.UnpackItAsksomeoneelsetoreadthroughthequestions,oneatatime,andallowgroupmemberstosharetheinitialthoughtstheywrotedown.UseYourImaginationGivethegrouptimetotalkabouttheimaginationexercise,offeringspacetoshareandunpackwhattheyeachwrotedown.ReflectonItEncouragediscussionoftheresponsesinthissectionoftheguide.Asyouleadyourgroupthroughthisguide,remembertheseprotips:*Maketimeforeachpersontoshare.Thegoalistogeteveryonetalking,tohaveeverybody’svoiceheardandincludedaspartofthediscussion.Thisdoesn’tmeaneverybodyneedstoanswereachparticularquestion,butbemindfulifcertainpeoplearedominatingthediscussion.eDon’tmakeeveryoneshare.Sexisasensitivetopic.Somepeoplemightnotbecomfortablesharingtheirthoughtsorexperience,ortheymightstillbeprocessingandnotbereadytoshareyet.Respect+Studyxy

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that.Don’tpressurepeopletocontributewhoaren’treadyordon’twantto.Myhopeisthatbytheendyou’llhaveabigger,morebeautifulpictureofGod,thegospel,andtheChristianvisionforsex.IknowI’vebeenimpactedtremendouslybyreflectingontheconceptsattheheartofthisbook,andIhopeyouwillbetoo.InChrist,Josh

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PART|SexAsIcoN

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INTRODUCTION:BEAUTYANDMYSTERYBasedontheintroductionofBeautifulUnion.Takeaway:Sexisiconic.It’sdesignedtopointtogreaterthings.Beautifulmaynotbethefirstwordthatcomestomindwhenyouthinkofsex.ParticularlytheChristianvisionforsex.Backward.Bigoted.Outdated.Oppressive.Prudish.Puritanical.ThesewordsarewhatmanythinkofthetraditionalChristiansexualethictoday.ButwhatifItoldyoubeautifulcanbethefirstwordthatcomestomind?That’sthegoalofthisbook:torestorethebeautyoftheChristiansexualethic.Sexisiconic.It’sdesignedtopointtogreaterthings.That’sthecentralthesisofthisbook.WhatdoImeanby“icon”?Historically,iconswerenotmeanttobelookedatsomuchastobelookedthrough.Theypointedtosomethingbeyondthemselves.Sexcanbeaniconoranidol,eitherawindowwelookthroughtogetaglimpseofthegloryandgoodnessofGod,oramirrorthatreflectsourselfishness,brokenness,anddestruction.ThefirststepinrestoringthebeautyofChristiansexualethicsistolearntolookthroughsextogreaterthings.Throughoutourexploration,wewilldiscoverthatGodislove.TheloveofGodistheendgameofthisbook,forit’swhattheiconpointsto.Goddesignedsextorevealhisloveintechnicolor.UnpackIt

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1.WhenyouthinkofChristiansexualethics,whatwordsfirstcometoyourmind?Isbeautyoneofthem?Whyorwhynot?2.Historically,iconswerenotmeanttobelookedatsomuchastobelookedthrough.Theypointedtosomethingbeyondthemselves.Sexisiconic.Whatdoyouthinkofthisidea?oUsethespacebelowtomakealistofsomegreaterthingsyouthinkGodmighthavedesignedsextopointto,regardingthenatureofourworldandthelifeweweremadeforwithGod.3.Ourculturehasputsexina“mega”placeyetstrippeditofitsmystery.We’vebeentrainedbyculturetolookatsexbutnottolookthroughit.Whataresomewaysyou’veseenareducedvisionofsexshowupinourculture—thatis,inmovies,televisionshows,songs,orotherareasofpopculture?I~StudyXY

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eDoyoufindthisvisionforsexsatisfying,ordoyouwishthereweresomethingmore?4.Howmightpeoplearoundyoudescribethegreaterpurposeofsex?Thinkofyourfriendsandfamily,neighborsandco-workers.Whatwordsmighttheyusetodescribewhatsexisfor?5.Goddesignedsextorevealhisloveintechnicolor.HowmightsexbedesignedtopointtotheloveofGod?Describesomespecificcharacteristics,inahealthyexperienceofsex,thatmightreflectaspectsofGod’slove.

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6.Whataresomewaysthisimageoflovemightgetbroken?DescribesomespecificpracticesorexperiencesthatcouldbreakGod’sdesignforsexandfailtoaccuratelyreflecttheloveofGod.7.Listatleastonethingfromtheintroductionthatstoodouttoyouorsurprisedyou.UseYourImaginationImagineyouareatwelfth-centurypeasantinFrance.Theprintingpresshasn’tbeeninvented,soyoudon’townaBible.You’veheardthestoriesofScripture,butyouareilliterate.Whenyouvisityourlocalchurch,however,youseeaniconofChristPantocrator.Thepriestexplainsitssymbolismtoyou.1.WhatrolemightthisiconplayasalearningtoolforyourunderstandingofGod?+Studyxy

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2.Howmightitfunctionasamemorydeviceforyourimagination?Likethattwelfth-centurypeasant,ourcurrentcultureisilliterateaboutGodinmanyways.Yetit’sobsessedwithsex.IfGodhasembeddedsexlikeaniconintheheartofoursociety...3.HowmightreclaiminganiconicvisionofsexdeepenyourunderstandingofGod?4.HowmightsuchavisionhelpthosearoundyouexperienceafreshencounterwithGod?ReflectonItBeforeembarkingonthisjourney,takesometimetoprayaboutandreflectonanyhopes,fears,orquestionsyoumighthave.Feelfreetoincludeanypartsofyourstorythatrelatetothemeslikesex,romance,marriage,family,andGod.Herearesomequestionstoconsider:+StudyXy

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Whatareyourexpectationsforthisstudy?Whatisonethingyou'rehopingtolearn?Aquestionyou’rehopingtoanswer?Anexperienceyou’rehopingtoheal?Athemeyou’rehopingtodiscover?Sexisasensitivetopic.Whatfearsdoyouhave?Whataresomeunhelpfulwaysyou’veheardsextalkedaboutthatyouhopetoavoidasyouprogressthroughthisguide?

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1SEXASSALVATIONBasedonchapter1ofBeautifulUnion.Takeaway:Sexisaniconofsalvation,asignofourunionwithChristashischurch.Sexwasn’tdesignedtobeyoursalvationbuttopointyoutotheOnewhois.It’snotonlythegivingofvowsatthealtarbutalsowhathappensinthehoneymoonsuiteafterthatspeakstothelifeyouweremadeforwithGod.Ahusbandandwife’slifeoffaithfulloveisdesignedtopointtogreaterthings,butsoistheirsexualunion!SexisaniconofChristandthechurch.UnpackIt1.ReadEphesians5:31-32.Paulsaysit’snotonlythevowsofmarriage(“leaveandcleave”)butalsotheconsummationofmarriage(“oneflesh”)thatspeakstoChristandthechurch.Themaritalembraceisaniconofsalvation.Thiselevatesthesacredsignificanceofsex.eHowdoesthisiconicviewofsexconfrontthoseinourchurcheswhomightseesexasdirty?

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*Howdoesthisconfrontthoseinourculturewhomightseesexassimplyaboutpersonalpleasure?*Doesthisdifferfromyourpersonalviewofsex?Ifso,how?2.Takeamomenttoconsiderhowyou’vehistoricallythoughtaboutsex,themaleandfemalesidesofbodilyunion,andmasculineandfemininetendenciesinsexualdesire.Usethespacebelowtowriteoutafewthoughts.eSexismutualself-giving.Husbandsandwivesbothextendgenerosity,givingtheirbodiestoeachother,andbothextendI~StudyXY

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hospitality,welcomingthebodiesofeachother.YetthereisalsoaniconographicrealityGodhasinscribedinourbodies.Whatdoyouthinkoftheideathatmaleandfemaledifferencesinbodilyunion,onaconjugallevel,areiconicofthegenerosityandhospitalityattheheartofourunionwithChrist?eHowdoesdesireasaniconofChrist’saffectionforhisbrideaffectyourviewofmasculinetendenciesindesire?eHowdoesdesireasaniconofthechurch’slongingtoberomancedaffectyourviewoffemininetendenciesindesire?3.Inwhatwaysdoessexasaniconofsalvationpoint,asananalogy,tothegreaterunionyouweremadeforwithGod?I~StudyXY

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4.HowdoesGod’siconicvisionconfrontrapeandsexualassaultashorrificevilsthatinvertthedivinedesignandstandunderthejudgmentofGod?eHowdoesGod’siconicvisionhelpexplainwhysomethingdeepisviolatedintheactofprostitution,forboththebuyerandseller,asadistortionofthepicturesexwasdesignedtopointto?eHowdoesitfeelknowingthatthesearenotpartofGod’sdesign?T=StudyXY

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5.Whilemarriageshowsustheshapeofthegospel,singlenessshowsusthesufficiencyofthegospel.[llHowdoesaniconicvisionsupport,ratherthandetractfrom,thesacredsignificanceofsingleness?eWhatarewaysthechurchhasfallenshortofthisvision?eWhyisitcrucialthatthechurchupholdasacredvisionforsingleness?6.Listatleastonethingfromthischapterthatstoodouttoyouorsurprisedyou.

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UseYourImaginationTakeamomenttoreviewthephrasing“oneflesh”fromthebook(pages8-9).Let’scontrasttheone-fleshunionwithsomeother(unbiblical)metaphorsforsalvation.Tobeclear,thefollowingarenotaccuratevisionsofsalvation.Theyarefalse,yettheyrepresentapproachespeopleoftentaketoGod.ThepointistocontrastthebeautyofsexualunionagainstthebackdropofthesefalseimagesGodhasnotchosentouse.Considerwhateachofthesefalsemetaphorswouldcommunicateaboutthenatureofthegospel.1.ClimbingtheSacredMountain.Godsitsatopatreacherousmountain.Athletestraintheirwholelivesinpreparationfortheascent.Onlythosewhodevelopmuscularstrength,physicalagility,andcardiovascularendurancecanmastertheclimb.Ontheappointedday,climbersracetothetop.Thosewithinjuriesordisabilitiesarepreventedfromparticipatingintherace.Manyclimbersdieonthetrek.OnlythosewhomakeittothetopseethefaceofGodandareawardedanewmansiontolivein.oWhatdoesthismetaphorimplyaboutthenatureofsalvation?*InwhatwaysdoesthismetaphorcontradictwhatGodtellsusabouttheone-fleshnatureofsalvation(seethediscussionofJesusasthePursuingGodonpages16-17ofthebook)?

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*HowdoessuchgracechangehowyouapproachGod?2.TheWorkCrew.Godsetsprisonersfree,breakingthemoutofcaptivityfromtheirdarkcellsofsolitaryconfinement.Onceoutinthelightofday,however,they’reimmediatelyclothedinorangejumpsuitsandputtowork.Theypickuptrash,mowlawns,buildplaygrounds,constructhomes,andhelpoldladiescrossthestreet.Everyoneisgivenawalkie-talkiesoGodcangivethemtheirnewassignmentseveryhour,onthehour.TheyneverseeGodagainbutaregivenjustenoughfoodtohavetheenergytocompletetheirassignments.eWhatdoesthismetaphorimplyaboutthenatureofsalvation?eInwhatwaysdoesthismetaphorcontradictwhatGodtellsusabouttheone-fleshnatureofsalvation(see“InDefenseofRomanticWorshipMusic”onpage21inthebook)?

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¢HowdoessuchlovechangehowyoulivewithGod?3.ThePopularityContest.WinnersinapopularitycontestaregiveneliteaccesstotheprivatenetworkLifeHackswiththeSavior.Everyday,Jesuspostsanewvideowiththehottesttipsondiet,exercise,timemanagement,romance,andmore.Thosewhofollowthedailyregimenbecomesmarter,faster,healthier,happier,andmoreattractivethantheirpeers.WhileJesushasnevermetthempersonally,hegivesthemalltheyneedtolivemoresatisfyinglives.*Whatdoesthismetaphorimplyaboutthenatureofsalvation?¢InwhatwaysdoesthismetaphorcontradictwhatGodtellsusabouttheone-fleshnatureofsalvation(see“TheHeartofSalvation”onpage19inthebook)?+Studyxy

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eWhatdoessuchsecuritydotoyourheartandaffectiontowardGod?ReflectonItYouweremadeforunionwithGod.Howdoesthisdifferfromwhatyou’vepreviouslyunderstoodaboutthepointoftheChristianlife?HowisthisamorebeautifulpictureofthenatureofsalvationthanpopularmisunderstandingsofChristianity?Howcanyouholdontosexasaniconofsalvationtoremindyou—asananalogybutanimportantbiblicalone—ofthelifeyouweremadeforwithGod?

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PartllTHEBEAUTYOFSEX

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2WHYSunsetsAReBEAUTIFULBasedonchapter2ofBeautifulUnion.Takeaway:Sexisaniconofcreation,awindowintothestructureofourworld.ManandwomanareintroducedontheopeningpageoftheBible.“Maleandfemalehecreatedthem.”[2]What’softenmissed,however,isthattheyarenottheonlysuchpair.Genesis1introducesustothreeothermajormatedpairs:heavenandearth,landandsea,nightandday.Thesepairsstructurecreation.Whileeachcomponentismajesticonitsown,guesswherethemostbeautifulplacesincreationhappen?Wherethetwobecomeone.Together,manandwomanareatinytemplateforourterrestrialhome,awindowintothewonderofourenchantedworld,apint-sizedportraitofheavenandearth.Whenthetwobecomeone,theirconvergenceisaholyplace,withthepowerfulpotentialtobringforthbothbeautyandlife.Whentheybringtheirdiversityintounion,theirinterlockingbodiesareembeddedwithinanintertwineduniverse.Swirlingaroundusareheavenandearth,landandsea,nightandday.Sexisaniconofcreation.Loveisthemeaningoftheworld.Thisisthesecretthatsexreveals.Creationwasmadefordiversity-in-union,andsowereyou.Youweremadebylove,inlove,andforlove—theloveofyourCreator.Sexissacredbecauseit’sasignthatrevealsthisdeepstructureandpurposebeneaththe

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world.It’slikeakeythatunlocksthetruthofcreation,openingusuptothemysteryoftheuniverseandtheheartbeatofourCreator.UnpackIt1.Genesis1isstructuredbycomplementarypairs,madewithandforeachother:heavenandearth,landandsea,nightandday.Whenyousitattheintersectionofoneofthepairs,whatgoesthroughyourmind?Whatareyoufeeling?Doesonespecificcomplementarypairholdaspecialplaceinyourheart?Why?Usethespacebelowtorecordyouranswers.2.Beautyandlifecharacterizetheseintersections.Peoplearedrawntotheseplaceswherethetwobecomeone,regardlessofwhetherornottheybelieveinGod.HowdotheseintersectionspointtosomethingdeepergiventousbyGod?Whatmightthatbe?eHowcansexpointtoboththebeautyofunionandthenewlifethatcanemergefromit,asembeddedinthestructureofcreation?+Studyxy

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