Class Notes for Marriages, Families, and Intimate Relationships, 4th Edition

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iInstructor’s Resource ManualforWilliams, Sawyer, WahlstromMarriages, Families, & IntimateRelationshipsA Practical IntroductionFourth Edition

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iiiContentsChapter 1Seeking: Finding Happiness in Relationships in a Complex World1Chapter 2Understanding: Learning about Intimate Behavior16Chapter 3Gender: The Meanings of Masculinity & Femininity27Chapter 4Involvement: Dating, Pairing, & Courtship37Chapter 5Love: The Many Faces44Chapter 6Communication: Realizing Effective Intimacy54Chapter 7Sexuality: Interpersonal Sexuality, Sexual Values, & Behavior64Chapter 8Marriage: The Ultimate Commitment?73Chapter 9Variations: Nonmarital Families & Households83Chapter 10Reproduction: Decisions aboutHaving or Not Having Children95Chapter 11Parenting: Children, Families, & Generations104Chapter 12Work: Economics, Jobs, & Balancing Family Demands115Chapter 13Crises: Managing Stress, Disaster, Violence, & Abuse125Chapter 14Uncoupling: Separation & Divorce140Chapter 15Remarriage: Reinvented, Renewed, & Blended Families152

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1Chapter 1SEEKING:Finding Happiness in Relationships in aComplex WorldLearning ObjectivesAfter reading this chapter, students should be able to:1.1Discuss how love and relationships affect personal happiness.1.2Describe the components, types, and benefits of families.1.3Explain how the families of yesterday differed from our own.1.4Describe the great forces that influenced family life.Major Questions You Should Be Ableto Answer1.How could an intimate relationship make me happy?2.What are the principal components and benefits of marriage and family?3.How have the families of today been influenced by the past?4.What economic and demographic forces are affecting the family?On the WebWhat Do You Seek in Love & Intimacy?Oxford Happiness Questionnaire—Meaning and Happinesswww.meaningandhappiness.comAt the start of every chapter, we offer you the opportunity to go on the Internet to investigate asubject that will make theforthcoming material more relevant to you. This is the first one.Aprincipal theme of this book is that we seek happiness in intimate relationships. But what ishappiness? To begin toinvestigate this subject, go to the website “Oxford HappinessQuestionnaire—Meaning and Happiness.” After you finish, you canlook at the “Interpretation ofScore” to see how you scored in relation to others.Chapter OutlineI.1.1 Seeking Happiness through Love & IntimacyMany people think that they will be happy if they can find the right relationship. In fact,among the happiest people are those who are married. It’s possible that you can manage youremotions for happiness just as you manage other things in your life. Happy couples havecommon strengths in at least five areas.MajorQuestion 1.1: How could an intimate relationship make me happy?

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2A.Love, Marriage, & Happiness1.Loneliness may be hazardous to one’s health2.Singles may be better off because some research shows that marriage actually reducessocial tiesB.Marriage & Well-Being1.Who is very happy?a.40% of married peopleb.24% of people living togetherc.22% of those never marriedd.18% of those previously married2.Research shows that once adults marry, their well-being improvesC.NumbersThat Matter:Marriage, Families, & Happiness1.40% of married people say they are happy compared with 24% of never-marriedpeople2.75% of happy couples agree on the high quality of their communication3.Married couples declined from 71% of all families in 1970 to 48.4% in 2010D.Practical Action: Happiness: Is It within Your Grasp?1.The happiness “set point”2.Can money buy happiness?3.Where do you live? The effect of culture on happinessE.Love, Appreciation, & Happiness1.John Gottman indicates that the best predictor of divorce is contempt, which may bethwarted by cultivating a “culture of appreciation”F.How Happy Are You in a Relationship?1.Key areas that affect a couple’s happiness:a.They communicate wellb.They are flexible as a couplec.They are emotionally closed.They have compatible personalitiese.They agree on how to handle conflict2.Other areas that affect a couple’s happiness are:a.their sexual relationshipb.their choice of leisure activitiesc.the influence of family and friendsd.the ability to manage financese.an agreement on spiritual beliefsII.1.2 Marriage & Family: The Basic ConceptsMarriage has five components: emotional, ceremonial, legal, sexual faithfulness, andparenting. Family may be a traditional “modern” or nuclear family. Or today it may be a“postmodern” family, such as a two-household (binuclear) or blended family (stepfamily), oreven one consisting of “affiliated kin” who are family by reason of emotional closeness.Major Question 1.2: What are the principal components of marriage and family?A.What Is Marriage?1.Five components:

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3a.The emotionalcomponent: Is love necessary?i.Most people in the United States say they would marry for love. This is nottrue inall culturesb.The ceremonial component: Church, state, or other?i.Every culture has some sort of ceremony cementing the unionc.The legal component: Does the state have to be involved?i.The state has a legal interest once a marriage license is filed—legal marriageaffects matters of property, children, debts, and inheritanced.The sexual-faithfulness component: Are monogamy & exclusivity required?i.For most people, marriage is based on sexual exclusivity; however, there arevariations of this(a)Monogamy—one spouse only, the only legal form in the United States(b)Polygamyas polygyny—more than one wife(c)Polygamy as polyandry—more than one husbande.The parenting component: Are children the main reason for marriage?i.Themain “social” reason for marriage is to provide a stable framework forbearing, nurturing, socializing, rearing, and protecting childrenB.What IsaFamily?1.Family versus household: Not the samea.Traditionalfamily:Twoor more people related by blood, marriage, or adoption,and who live together; this obviously leaves many people out2.The formerly “modern” family: The nuclearfamilya.Nuclear/modern family:Husband, wife, childrenb.Family of origin: family one is born intoc.Family of procreation: family one begins upon marrying and having children3.Today’s “postmodern” families: Binuclear, blended, & single-parent familiesa.Postmodernfamily: describes the great variability in family constellationb.Binuclear: members live in two households(e.g., divorced parents with children)c.Blended family: stepfamilyd.Single-parentfamily: one parent living with child/children4.Theextendedfamily: Kin & affiliated kina.Kin: relatives by blood, marriage, remarriage, or adoptionb.Affiliated kin: unrelated individuals who are treated as if they are related5.Beyond the Household: Extended Families&Patterns of Residencea.Neolocal—In their own homeb.Patrilocal—With the husband’s familyc.Matrilocal—With the wife’s familyC.Why Have Families at All?Four Benefits1.Economic benefits: Economies of scalea.Greater income earning potential, distribution of chores2.Proximity: Conveniencea.Closeness;more convenient to obtain help or company3.Familiarity:At your best & at your worsta.Family members know the best and the worst about you4.Continuity: People who are always there for youa.Long-term emotional support, attachments, and assistance

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4III.1.3 A Short History of FamiliesThis section presents the history of the American family during threeeras: the earlyAmerican era, the 19th and early 20th centuries, and the modern era. We describe variationsfor different ethnic and racial groups.MajorQuestion 1.3: How have the families of today been influenced by the past?A.American Families inthe Colonial Era1.Native American familiesa.Marriage and sexb.Familiesc.Transitions2.White colonial familiesa.Marriage and sexb.Familiesc.Transitions3.African American familiesa.Marriage and sexb.Families4.Hispanic (Latino) familiesa.Marriage and sexb.FamiliesB.Families in the 19th& Early 20thCenturies1.Industrialization, urbanization, & immigrationa.Industrialization—From self-sufficient to wage-earning familiesb.Urbanization—The movement to the citiesc.Immigration—Two waves of newcomers2.The importance of kinship networks3.The changing family & changing rolesC.Families in the Modern Era1.Rise of a new form: The companionate family2.The effect of the World Wars &the Great Depressiona.TheGreat Depression—Out-of-work men blame themselvesb.World Wars I and II—Women take “male-only” jobs3.Families in the 1950sa.TheBabyBoom—The swelling populationb.Suburbanization—The move to the suburbsc.The child-centered culture4.How the family stands todaya.Trend #1—People are living longer and marrying laterb.Trend #2—Women are having fewer children and waiting longer to have themc.Trend #3—More people are living alone or in unmarried relationshipsd.Trend #4—More families are single-parent familiese.Trend #5—More two-parent families feature both parents workingf.Trend #6—There are more divorces, remarriages, and blended families5.Is the family in decline?

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5a.“The decline in two-parent families means trouble for children”b.“Children are no worse off with other kinds of parental arrangements”IV.1.4 Major Forces Affecting Relationships & FamiliesTraditional families are being radically influenced by economic and demographic forces.Economically, the family has been affected by the Industrial Revolution, technologicalchange, globalization, the mass media and popular culture, and the recent Great Recession.Demographic trends are affecting changes in ethnic and racial diversity.Major Question 1.4: What economic and demographic forces are affecting the family?A.Today’s Changing Families: Economic Forces1.The effect of the Industrial Revolution: From familism to individualisma.Familism: The family collective concernstakeprecedenceover the needs of theindividualb.Individualism: The needs of the individualtake priorityover the family collectiveconcerns2.Technologicalchange: More complexity or more choices?a.Fromtransportation tocommunicationb.Computers, theNet,andthewebc.Developments inbiologyd.Globalizationi.Argument for globalizationii.Argument against globalizatione.The mass media & popular culture: Relief from boredom & othereffectsi.Rolesii.Beliefsiii.Valuesf.The Great Recession of 2007–2009: The biggest economic setback since the1930s3.PracticalAction: HowAreSocialMediaAffectingRelationships?a.The iGenerationb.Thepositives ofcommunicationstechnologyc.Thenegatives ofcommunicationstechnology4.Today’s changing families: Demographic trendsa.Non-Hispanic whites—62.6% of Americans in 2013b.Hispanic or Latino—17.1% in 2013c.African Americans—13.2% in 2013d.Asian Americans—5.3% in 2013e.Native Americans & Alaskan natives—1.2% in 2013f.Native Hawaiian & other Pacific Islanders—0.2% in 2013g.Are racial & ethnic identities firm?h.The “no racial majority” scenario: Multiracial in AmericaB.Your Personal ExplorationKey Terms

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6Adolescence:a separate social and psychological stage of development coinciding with pubertyand characterized by rebellion and crises(p. 16).Affiliated kin:unrelated individuals who are treated as if they are related(p. 12).Beliefs:the definitions and explanations people have about what is true(p. 28).Binuclear family:a family in which members live in two different households, usually as aresult of parents being divorced and their children spending time with both(p. 11).Blended family:a familycreated when two people marry and one or both brings into thehousehold a child or children from a previousmarriage or relationship; also called a stepfamily(p. 11).Common-law marriage:a type of living arrangement in which a man and a woman livingtogetherpresent themselves as being married and are legally recognized as such(p. 9).Demographics:characteristicsof a populationsuch as family size, marriage and divorce rates,and ethnicity and race(p. 29).Demography:the study of population and populationcharacteristics, such as family size,marriage and divorce rates, and ethnicityand race(p. 29).Ethnicity:cultural characteristics that distinguish one group from another(p. 29).Extended family:afamily thatincludes not onlymembers ofthe nuclear family but otherpeopleas well(p. 12).Familism:a philosophy in whichfamily collective concerns take priority over individualconcerns(p. 18).Family:traditionally defined as a unit of two or more people who are related by blood, marriage,or adoption and who live together(p. 10).Family of cohabitation:the family you begin if and when you get married and have children;also called family of procreation(p. 11).Family of orientation:the family into which you were born orin which you grew up; alsocalled the family of origin(p. 11).Family of origin:see “family of orientation”(p. 11).Family of procreation:see “family of cohabitation”(p. 11).Globalization:the trend of the world economy toward becoming a more interdependent system(p. 27).Household:defined bythe U.S. Census Bureau as any group of persons residing together(p.10).Indentured servants:people who worked under contract to an employer for a number of yearsto pay for their passage to the New World or other obligations(p. 15).Individualism:a philosophy in whichindividual concerns take priority over family collectiveconcerns(p. 25).Kin:people in your family who are your relatives by blood, marriage, remarriage, or adoption,ranging from grandparents to nieces to brothers-in-law(p. 12).Marriage:a socially approved mating relationship(p. 7).Matriarchal family:family in which the mother holds the power(p. 15).

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7Matrilineal:system in whichchildren trace their descent, and perhaps rights and property,throughthe mother’s line(p. 14).Matrilocal residence:pattern of residence in whichnewly married partners reside with thewife’s family(p. 12).Media-sharing websites:online social networks in which members share media such as photos,video, andmusic(p. 25).Modern family:a family thatconsists of father, mother, and children living in one household;also called the nuclear family(p. 10).Monogamy:marital or sexual relationship in which a person is committed exclusively to onepartner(p. 9).Neolocal residence:pattern of residence in whichnewly married partners set up their ownhousehold(p .12).Nuclear family:see “modern family”(p. 10).Patriarchal family:a familyin which the father holds the power(p. 15).Patrilineal:system in whichdescent and ownership of property come down through the father’sline(p. 14).Patrilocal residence:pattern of residence in whichnewly married partners live with thehusband’s family(p. 12).Polyandry:marriage in which one wife has more than one husband(p. 10).Polygamy:form of marriage in which one person has several spouses(p. 9).Polygyny:marriage in which one husband has more than one wife(p. 9).Postmodern family:a termmeanttodescribe the great variability in family forms(p. 11).Puberty:the period during which one develops secondary sex characteristics (such as breasts orfacial hair) (p. 14).Race:inherited physical characteristics that distinguish one group from another(p. 29).Roles:patterns of behaviors expected of a person who occupies a certain social position within acertain group or culture(p. 28).Single-parent family:a familyin which a child or children lives with one parent(p. 11).Social networking websites:online communities of Internet users who share a common bond(p. 25).Stepfamily:see “blended family”(p. 11).Traditional family:family structure in which the man’s role is primarily husband, father, andincome earnerand the woman’s role is wife, mother, and homemaker(p. 11).Values:deeply held beliefs and attitudes about what is right and wrong, desirable andundesirable(p. 28).Web2.0:the second generation of the Internet, characterized bycommunication tools,wikis(websites that allow visitors to edit content), and socialnetworking websites(p. 25)Discussion Topics

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81.1Seeking Happiness through Love & Intimacy1.Happiness is an important and elusive topic; what will bring happiness to one person maybring misery to another. Yet we all seem to seek happiness in our relationships withothers.Amongthe most important relationships in our livesare thosewith the peoplewith whom we choose toshare our lives in an intimateway.Discusshow we seekdifferent components of happiness from different areas of ourlife.Then considerthetypes of happiness found in our intimate relationships and the qualities of the relationshipthat enhance and/orstrengthen happiness.2.What makes, or would make, you happy?Have students provide a list of things theythink will make them happy and write these on the board. Help students recognize thatdifferent things make different people happy, andguidethemindetectingany biases theymay have toward accepting what makes another happy.3.How do you know when you are happy?Students will usually identify abstract thingssuch as “I feel good” or “I just feel happy.” Help them identify behaviorally observableways of telling how they are happy, such as being more active, smiling more, speakingmore often to people, and having more energy. This helps students recognize that theymay be happy even when they don’t “feel” it, and this recognition may increase theiroverall feelings of happiness if they see that they are happy more often.1.2Marriage & Family: The Basic Concepts1.Whatdifference does marriagemake?Havestudents discuss the pros and cons ofmarriage. Help them realize the legal, social, and sexual components. Is there a genderdifference in the way students respond?2.What is afamily?Askstudentstolist the types of families they know (gay, single,divorced, widowed, never married, etc.).3.What have you gained from being a part of afamily?Helpstudents recognize thebenefits of being in a family, either family of origin or family of procreation (sharingchores, friends and confidants closeby, someone to accept you as you are, someone whoalways cares about you).1.3A Short History of Families1.The concepts of marriage and family have changed radicallysincethefirst half of the20th century. While some fulfill the needs of marriage and family in the traditional way,many more fulfill these needs in less traditional ways.Discuss what these changes mean to people seeking nontraditional families andmarriages (gays, cohabitation, and single parents).Discuss how choosing a nontraditional family can be difficult for families of originand friends.

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9Discuss ways to show acceptance to nontraditional families. For example, educateyourself about other lifestyles, don’t use derogatory terms such as “That is so gay!”and include nontraditional family members as you would any other family member.2.The American family has changed a great deal in the last century.Discuss what some of these changes mean. For example, two-income families meangreater resources but less parent/child interactions. Both parents working means thatyoung children are in the care of another person, which causes an increase in daycarecenters and other alternative forms of childcare.The increase in single-parent families (most often headed by single mothers) creates agroup of people with the lowest incomes. Discuss what it means to be a single motherin today’s society.The divorce rate creates changes in how marriage is viewed. For example, someyoung people view their marriage as a “first marriage,” with the expectation they willmarry again. Discuss why marriage may no longer be viewed as “a lifetimecommitment.”1.4Major Forces Affecting Relationships & Families1.What do you think ofglobalization?Describethe arguments for and againstglobalization and have students discuss the pros and cons as they see them. Help them seethe other perspectives and expand their worldview to fit others’ views. (This may be achallenging topic if some of their family members have lost jobs to globalization.)Class Activities and HandoutsIn-Class ActivityBring in a variety of commonly available popular magazines. Be sure to collect magazinesrepresenting differing ages, ethnicities, races, and cultures. Divide the class into groups of threeto four students, and give each group a magazine. Give groups 10 minutes to identify the variousfamily forms depicted and list demographics such as age, race, and ethnicity. Have each groupidentify roles, values, and diversity represented in each magazine. Allow time for each group toreport their discoveries to the larger group.

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10Out-of-Class ActivityRead the case studies of the ideal family, and then answer the case-study questions.The Ideal FamilyCase No. 1Mr. and Mrs. Falborne live in a lovely apartment in a large city. All bills are incorporated intotheir rental fee. Both have pleasant jobs. Each morning they breakfast together and then depart totheir differing interests of the day. They seldom see each other during daytime hours but each isinterested in the other’s work. They lunch separately and often dine out together in the evening.They are successful and happy. They have friends of many kinds. They live in a world full ofopportunities for gracious living, and each has some private interests to which they devote part oftheir time, effort, and money. Each is “somebody” in the eyes of the other. They have nochildren. They are not against children, but they are not in a rush for them. They will have asmany as they feel comfortable with and for whom they can find suitable resources to help carefor them. They do not have maid service daily, but someone comes in weekly. They expect to begood parents, but the wife expects to continue her career, so they will involve other people andcommunity resources in the rearing of their children. They feel that their commitment in life is tothemselves and their world and to raising their children to operate effectively in life.Case No. 2Robin and Keri live in a nice house in the suburbs of a mid-sized town. They are bothprofessionals working in jobs that provide them with meaning in their lives. They feel they arecontributing to society with the work they do. They have many outside interests that occupy theirtime and each enjoys these activities. They are involved in some outside activities together, andothers they are involved in without the other. They are comfortable with each other, dedicated totheir relationship, and comfortable with their sexual orientation. They feel their lives arecommitted to social justice and service. At timesthey experience prejudice,but this does nothappen often, and they have a strong support network and many accepting friends andcolleagues. They have no children but have discussed adopting at some point in the future whenthey feel ready for the responsibility and have resources available.Case No. 3Mr. and Mrs. Claymore live in a small town in a medium-sized house with a lovely yard. Theneighborhood is alive with children. Mr. Claymore has a responsible and respectable job withalocal firm. Mrs. Claymore does not work outside the home except in emergencies. Four childrenkeep her occupied. She is active in the Parent-Teacher Association (P.T.A.), church, and in somecommunity groups in which she has an interest. Mr. Claymore is solid, religious, and attentive tohis family and his yard. He has a few sound contacts within the community that he maintains.The family does a lot of things together,such aspicnicking, visiting, and hobbies—nothingfancy, but pleasant. The neighborhood is friendly and the family interchanges activities withother couples and families throughout the town. Members of this family like one another andsupport one another in various activities. Life is not exciting, but neither is it dull. It hasregularity and routine with which everyone feels comfortable and it has a predictability felt by

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11young and old. Mr. and Mrs. Claymore jointly head up the home and each is willing tocondescend to the other though they generally believe that father should be the head. Thechildren fit in well with their peer groups with occasional upsets. Family members are likableand liked. They are developing skills but are not greatly pressured concerning them. Life for thisfamily is pleasant and regular and all seems to fit into its place.Case No. 4Mr. and Mrs. Featherwell live in a lovely, spacious house in the suburbs of one of our centralcities. Mrs. Featherwell is president of her local Parent-Teacher Association (P.T.A.) and is anactive member of other community and women’s groups. Mr. Featherwell is a junior executive inone of the large companies in the city. They have three children, ages 12, 9, and 7. They areusually nicely dressed and are rather careful around the house. Family and children’s friends arenumerous, but they are screened with some degree of selectivity and friendship with certaingroups is greatly reinforced. Mr. Featherwell is involved in some community groups where heseeks to play an active role, as he does also inhis church. He provides the income and, with help,takes care of the yard, of which he is very proud. Mrs. Featherwell handles the budget and is anexcellent hostess. They are going to a company party and she has just called her husband and afriend for further details and to determine and discuss what she should wear. The children havebeen waiting for her to take them to their activity for the afternoon and are becoming quite verbalin their impatience at her slowness. Family council is held once a week in this family, directedby the father. Each person is considered an individual and has freedom to express himself orherself as such. The family does some things together and frequently seeks to be involved ineducational and cultural activities. Mr. and Mrs. Featherwell go places frequently togetherwithout the children and even for extended periods of time, duringwhichthey hire someone tocare for the children. Life at the Featherwells’ homeoperates very efficiently under the mother’sguidance and is generally pleasant, but proceeds at a hurried pace. Children are expected todemonstrate achievement in some of their activities and to develop skills.Case No. 5Mr. and Mrs. Trueman could be living in any city or area of the country. He is advancing wellwith his company. Mrs. Trueman thinks he is a wonderful person. He makes many contacts andis a well-known figure in the world in which he operates. His family is well informed andrespected by others in the community. Mrs. Trueman is happy with his activity on behalf ofherself and the family, but she is quite content to stay in the background and let him front for thefamily. They are very polite and cordial with one another and with their children, who are wellbehaved andareachieving well in school and in the development of personality skills. Theirnames often appear on the lists of achievers. Life in the home is organized around the comingand going of the father. Mrs. Trueman spends a lot of her time in home hobbies and in visitingthe neighbors and the ladies of the church. She involves her children in the home activities,particularly the girls, while Mr. Trueman gives more time to his boys, trying to be at theiractivities when he can and taking time off with them on occasion. Life in the family revolvesaround the mother and her rather gentle approach to and acceptance of life, but when fathercomes home the pattern shifts to accommodate what his world requires. Life is rather proper inthis family, but somewhat relaxed, and family members each have satisfactory worlds in whichthey operate.

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12Case No. 6Mr. and Mrs. Straman live in a medium-sized house in a respectable urban housing situation.They have four children. Both work at jobs they like and in which they find satisfaction. There isnot a lot of interchange between them concerning their jobs or activities. Each is a strongindividual entity, and they go their separate ways without much worry about one another. Ifemergencies come up they pitch in and help one another, but otherwise each is expected to be onhis/her own. The children have been given the same privileges of being strong individuals andhave a strong voice in family affairs. They do not hold family councils. Life revolves largelyaround the mother at home, with the father free to come and go as he wishes. The mother mayhire help, or do whatever is needed to handle the home situations without overdoing herself.They consider themselves a very modern family. The husband and wife do not engage in a lot ofjoint activities, though they will when needed. They build their relationship on a strongaffectional sex life. They move about the community as they wish, choosing their activities andassociates and encouraging their children to do the same. They are supportive of the children andback them strongly, but they will also put pressure on them to express their personal strengths.Life in the home varies with the situation and in mood and tempo. It has a situational aspect to itthat decides what shall be done. They contribute to community and church affairs in the areas inwhich they feel interested and capable. The mother may be as free as the husband to move aboutin the home. A family of strong individualists, this family flows with the tide as needed, is nothighly analytical or emotionallycommunicative, but is very supportive of each one’s selection ofways to express the strength of his/her individuality.

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13Name: ________________________________________ Date: ____________________Case Study QuestionsEach of these family lifestyles allows the expression of individual personality. Each family goesabout it differently and does not produce the same types of personalities, but each representsdifferent kinds of family strengths. You won’t find exactly what you want in any of them.Nevertheless, some will carry the message of what you want more than others. Answering thefollowing questions should help you gain a better recognition of what you are looking for andwhat you are biased towardand against, particularly as we may have the opportunity tointerchange ideas in class sessions.1.Which of these families most closely reflects the image you have of a good family? You maynot like any of them, but you should be able to pick one as being more reflective of yourideas.2.Identify three things about the family you chose that caused you to be more attracted to it.a.b.c.3.Is there anything in the family you chose that you dislike? If so, identify it.4.Which of these family groups seems to have achieved the most. . .________ a.unity?________ b.favorable conditions for providing for the personal satisfaction of each familymember?________ c.favorable conditions for providing for the personal welfare of husband andwife, i.e. the well-being of their “pair” relationship?________ d.favorable conditions for increased open conflict and struggle among familymembers?________ e.clear evidence of love expression among family members?________ f.balanced organization of family resources?

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145.As you look at each casestudy, what is it that most strikes you about each family?Case 1:Case 2:Case 3:Case 4:Case 5:Case 6:6.Looking back at the answers you have given, what clues do they suggest about yourparticular desires for your own family?

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15Diversity ResourcesNational Center for Family and Marriage Researchhttps://www.bgsu.edu/ncfmr.htmlThis site offers various resources by topics and data sets, and it provides family profiles,comparisons, and data. The NCFMR extols a three-fold mission—research, training, anddissemination.National Healthy Marriage Resource Centerhttp://www.healthymarriageinfo.org/index.aspxThis resource is “a clearinghouse for high quality, balanced, and timely information andresources on healthy marriage.”The NHMRC’sstatedmission is to“be a first stop forinformation, resources, and training on healthy marriage for experts, researchers, policymakers,media, marriage educators, couples and individuals, program providers, and others.”University of Central Florida:MarriageandFamilyResearchInstitutewww.mfri.ucf.eduThe University of Central Florida Marriage and Family Research Institute conducts originalresearch to meet goals including the facilitation of scholarly activity of faculty and graduatestudents interested in marriage and family issues and imparting skills and best practices toprofessional and nonprofessional individuals and couples.U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Administration for Children & Familieshttps://www.acf.hhs.gov/The Administration for Children & Families’ missionincludes helping married couples “gaingreater access to marriage educationservices, on a voluntary basis, where they can acquire theskills and knowledge necessary to form and sustain a healthy marriage.”

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1Chapter 2UNDERSTANDING:Learning about Intimate BehaviorLearning ObjectivesAfter reading this chapter, students should be able to:2.1Identify and explain the steps involved in critical thinking.2.2Discuss the eight key theoretical perspectives on the family anddescribe how macro-andmicro-level orientations apply to theperspectives.2.3Explain the five principalkindsof scientific research and the importance of objectivity.Major Questions You Should Be Able to Answer1.Is there a more beneficial way to approach the world and ideas thanI might be takingnow?2.What are eight perspectives for looking at the family andrelationships?3.What are five principal kinds of scientific research?On the WebUnderstanding AdvertisingJean Kilbournehttp://jeankilbourne.comDo you really know how advertising works? See if you can find out one thing about ads thatmakes you realize how they influence you. To start, you might go to the website “JeanKilbourne” andclick on “Get Active.” What did you learn?Chapter OutlineI.2.1 Learning How to Think: Keys to Being Open-MindedWe discuss how uncritical thinking can hinder ourapproach to the truth. We thendescribefour steps in critical thinking.Major Question2.1:Is there a more beneficial way to approach the world and ideas thanImight be taking now?A.NumbersThat Matter: How Times Have Changed1.The average American spent 4.5 hours daily watching TVin 2013B.Uncritical Thinking & Magical Thinking1.The enemy: Our mind-setsC.Critical Thinking1.The steps in critical thinking

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2a.Get an understanding of the problemb.Gather information and interpret itc.Develop a solution plan and carry it outd.Evaluate the plan’s effectivenessD.Example of Magical Thinking: The Vaccine Doubters1.Takinghealth forgranted2.Thediscreditedautismconnection3.Antiscience & the InternetE.Critical Thinking: Skills versus DispositionF.Practical Action: The Steps in Critical Thinking1.Get an understanding of the problem2.Gather information & interpret it3.Develop a solution plan & carry it out4.Evaluate the plan’s effectivenessII.2.2 Theoretical Perspectives on the FamilyTheories offer perspectives explaining why processes and events occur. Eightperspectivesfor viewing marriage and family are structural-functional, conflict, symbolic interaction,family systems, social exchange, feminist/male studies, ecological, and family development.Major Question 2.2:What are eight perspectivesfor looking at the family andrelationships?A.Two Types of Theories: Macro-Level versus Micro-Level Orientations1.Macro-level orientation: The top-down view2.Micro-level orientation: The bottom-up viewB.The Structural-Functional Perspective: The family is a social institution performingessential functions1.Manifest functions: intended2.Latent functions: unintended3.Applying theperspective: Families have three main functions:a.To ensure that society has an ongoing supply of new membersandto be a sourceof socializationb.To provide economic support for family membersc.To provide emotional support for family membersC.The Conflict Perspective: Conflict & change, not harmony, is the normal state of thefamily1.Applying the perspectivea.Conflict over powerb.Conflict over resourcesD.The Symbolic Interaction Perspective: People’s interactions ultimately determine theirbehavior1.Applying the perspectivea.Definition of the situationb.Self-image based on others’interactionsc.Predictability of behavior

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3E.The Family Systems Perspective: Family members are interconnected,&changes in onemember affect the others1.Applying the perspectiveF.The Social Exchange Perspective: Individuals seek the most benefits & the least costs ina relationship1.Applying the perspectiveG.The Feminist Perspective: Inequality between men & women results from maledominance1.Applying the perspectivea.Emphasis on inequalityb.No one kind of familyc.Reduction in harassment and violence2.Men’sstudiesH.The Ecological Perspective:The family is influenced by & influences its environment1.Applying the perspectiveI.The Family Development Perspective: Individuals & families change through stages oflife1.Applying the perspectiveJ.IsAnyPerspectiveBetter thanAnyOther?1.Pluses & minusesa.Structural-functionalb.Conflictc.Symbolicinteractionistd.Familysystemse.Socialexchangef.Feministg.Ecologicalh.FamilydevelopmentIII.2.3 How Do You Know What’s True? Learning to EvaluateResearch ResultsFive principal kinds of scientific research are survey, clinical,observational, experimental,and other—cross-cultural, historical, and longitudinal.When looking at research findings, beaware of the blinders of your own experienceand the flaws that can affect research studies.Major Question 2.3:What are five principal kindsof scientific research?A.SurveyResearch: Collecting data by questionnaire or interview from representativesamples1.Step1: Decide on the population&the samplea.Representative (random) sampleb.Nonrepresentative sample2.Step2: Gather the data: Using questionnaires or interviewsa.Survey by questionnaireb.Survey by interview3.Step3: Analyze & generalize the resultsB.Clinical Research: In-depth examination of individuals or groups in counseling1.Benefits: host of insights

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42.Drawbacks: results can’t be generalizedC.Observational Research: Observing people in their usual surroundings1.Two kinds of observationa.Participant observation—Interact anonymously with subjectsb.Nonparticipant observation—Just observe subjects2.Benefits3.DrawbacksD.Experimental Research: Measuring behavior under controlled conditions1.Two kinds of variablesa.Independent variablesb.Dependent variables2.Experimental group versus control groupa.Experimental groupb.Control group3.Benefits4.DrawbacksE.OtherKinds ofResearch1.Cross-cultural2.Historical3.Longitudinal4.Content analysis5.Secondary analysisF.Trying toBeObjective: HowDoYouKnowWhat’sTrue?1.Your mind-sets: The possible filtersa.Ethnocentrism—“Mycountry orcultureisbest”b.Heterosexism—“Theonlylegitimatefamilyisheterosexual”c.Bias against not having children—“Childrenare theultimatereason”2.Possible flaws in research studiesa.Researcher is biasedb.Sample is biasedc.No control groupd.Questions not neutrally wordede.Time and other distortionsf.Questions of reliability and validityG.Using theSociologicalImagination: DifferentFolks,DifferentFamiliesKey TermsCase study method:research thatconsists of clinical practitioners working directly withindividuals or families using interviews, observation, and analysis of records (p.58).Clinical research:entails in-depth study of individual or small groups who have soughtcounseling for psychological, relationship, or marital/family problems from mental healthprofessionals (p.58).Conflict perspective:views individuals and groups as being basically in conflict with each otherfor power and scarce resources (p.50).

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5Content analysis:the systematic examination of cultural artifacts or various forms ofcommunication to extract thematic data and draw conclusions about social life (p.60).Control group:group in which subjects are not introduced to the independent variable by theresearcher (p.59).Critical thinking:clear thinking, skeptical thinking, active thinking; actively seeking tounderstand, analyze, and evaluate information in order to solve specific problems (p.44).Cross-cultural study:studyin which social scientists compare data on family life amongdifferent kinds of societies (p.60).Dependent variables:factors or behaviors that are affected by changes in the independentvariable (p.59).Developmental tasks:family members fulfill specific role expectations and responsibilities asthey move through the life cycle (p.54).Ecological perspective:examines how a family (or individual) is influenced by and influencesits environment (p.53).Ethnocentrism:the belief that one’s native country, culture, language, abilities, or behavior aresuperior to those of another culture (p.61).Experiment:factors or behaviors are measured or monitored under closely controlledcircumstances (p.59).Experimental group:group in which subjects are exposed to an independent variableintroduced by the researcher (p.59).Experimental research:research in which researchers try to isolate a single factor or behaviorunder controlled conditions to determine its effect (p.59).Expressive role:the role of the female asahomemaker who is nurturing and supportive (p.47).Family development perspective:proposes that family members accomplish developmentaltasks as they move through stages in the family life cycle (p.54).Family life cycle:family members’roles and relationships change, largely depending on howthey have to adapt to the absence or presence of child-rearing responsibilities (p.54).Family systems perspective:suggests that family members make up a system of interconnectedparts of a whole and that changes in one part change the other parts (p.51).Feminist perspective:the view that inequality in women’s roles is the result of male dominancein the family and in society (p.52).Generalized:the results ofthesample can be applied to the population, or the larger group (p.58).Hawthorne effect:situation in whichsubjects of research change from their typical behaviorbecause they realize they are under observation (p.59).Heterosexism:the belief that the standard family is heterosexual, with homosexual families(lesbian and gays) not being viewed as true families (p.61).Historical study:study in which researchers compare census, social agency, or demographicdata to ascertain changing patterns of family life (p.60).Independent variables:factors or behaviors that can be controlled or manipulated by theexperimenter (p.59).

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6Instrumental role:the role of the male asthebreadwinner who is hard-working, self-confident,and competitive (p.47).Interviewer bias:bias of interviewers that allows their own preconceptions to influence howthey ask questions (p.57).Latent functions:unconscious or unintended functionsthathave hidden purposes (p.47).Longitudinal study:studyin which researchers use questionnaires or interviews over a numberof years to follow up on earlier investigations (p.60).Macro-level orientation:focuses on large-scale patterns of society (p.47).Magical thinking:the interpreting of two closely occurring events as though one caused theother, without any concern for causal link (p.43).Manifest functions:functions that are open, stated, and conscious (p.47).Micro-level orientation:focuses on small-scale patterns of society, concentrating on individualinteractions in specific settings (p.47).Nonparticipant observation:researchers observetheir subjects without interacting with them(p.58).Nonrepresentative sample:asamplein which participants arechosenby researchers on thebasis of convenience or availability (p.57).Observational research:research in which researchers obtain information data by observingpeople in their usual surroundings (p.58).Participant observation:researchers interact with the subjects they are observing but do notreveal that they are researchers (p.58).Population:any well-known group of people social scientists want to study (p.57).Random sample:a sample in which everyone ina particularpopulation has an equal chance ofbeingincluded; also called representative sample(p.57).Reliability:the degree to which a measurement method produces the same results when repeatedby the same or other researchers (p.62).Representative sample:see “random sample”(p.57).Sample:small group of the population to be studied; may be representative or nonrepresentative(p.57).Secondary analysis:the analysis of data collected by other researchers (p.60).Socialexchange perspective:proposes that people’s interactions represent the efforts of eachperson to maximize hisorher benefits and minimize costs (p.52).Socialization:the process by which offspring learn attitudes, beliefs, and values appropriate totheir society and culture so they can function effectively in society (p.49).Sociological imagination:the influence of social structure and culture on interpersonaldecisions (p. 63).Stratified random sample:a sample of specific subgroups ofa particularpopulation in whicheveryone in the subgroups has an equal chance of being included in the study (p.57).Structural-functional perspective:views the family as a social institution that performsessential functions for society to ensure its stability (p.47).

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7Surveyresearch:uses questionnaires or interviews to collect data from small representativegroups (samples), which are then used to generalize conclusions valid for larger groups(populations) (p.57).Symbolic interaction perspective:focuses on internal family interaction, the ongoing actionand response of family members to one another (p.50).Theory:a perspective or a set of statements that explains why processes and events occur (p.46).Thomas theorem:theorem that states,“If people define situations as real, they are real in theirconsequences”(p.50).Validity:the degree to which a measurement method actually measures what it claims tomeasure and is free of bias (p.62).Variable:a factor that can be varied or manipulated in the experiment(p.59).Discussion Topics2.1Learning How to Think: Keys to Being Open-Minded1.Help students identify and analyze a basic assumption they have about family life. Forexample, many students believe that parents should rear their own children.Encouragestudentstodiscuss where they got this idea, if this idea is always the best, and how toanalyze alternatives. It is okay if in the end they decide that parents should raise theirown children because now they have examined the concept and have accepted it based onthought instead of default.Askthemtobegin to think of more challenging areas theyhave accepted by default rather than thought, such as religion, politics, college major—the list goes on.2.Why develop critical thinking skills?Have students discuss the differences betweencritical thinking and habitual or uncritical thinking. Help them learn that critical thinkingis more difficult and takes more time, at least in the beginning. Have them discuss thevalue of being able to think critically to help them be motivated to putting forth an effortto think in this new way.2.2 Theoretical Perspectives on the Family1.Have students discuss the differences among the eight perspectives.Askthemtopointout strengths and weaknesses of each perspective. Help them understand that eachperspective isflawed on its own and that true critical thinking employs a variety ofperspectives.2.3 How Do You Know What’s True? Learning to Evaluate Research Results1.Discuss the benefits of research and the limits of findings. Often students becomedisillusioned when they find out that they cannot completely accept the findings ofresearch. (Help them rethink critical thinking skills.) Help them realize that all research

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8has limitations, and that when these limitations are considered, we gain information andbroaden our understanding of the topic.Class Activities and HandoutsThe following handouts may be printed out and used for in-class and/or out-of-class activitiesrelated to the topicscoveredin this chapter.

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9In-Class ActivityPlease provide the type of possible research flaws illustrated below:The Family Research Alliance,an organization supporting one woman/one man marriage,recently hired a researcher to examine the family behaviors of homosexual couples.Type of research flaw? ______________________When the researchers run the test again, they achieve different results.Type of research flaw? ______________________A researcher examines the effect of listening to music while learning math in a second-gradeclassroom.Type of research flaw? ______________________A major test to measure psychological problems is developed using people who are hospitalizedwith mental illness as its sample.Type of research flaw? ______________________A researcher creates a survey and does not test it with a small group first to make sure thewording is understandable.Type of research flaw? ______________________

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10Out-of-Class ActivityName: ____________________________________________ Date: ___________________For each of the eight theoretical perspectives listed below, please provide an example of a familyyou know (from TV, movies, literature, or real life) that demonstrates that perspective. Provide abrief explanation.1)Structural-Functional Perspective2)Conflict Perspective3)Symbolic Interaction Perspective4)Family Systems Perspective5)Social Exchange Perspective6)Feminist Perspective7)Ecological Perspective8)Family Development Perspective

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11Diversity ResourcesFamily Systems Theoryhttp://www.encyclopedia.com/topic/Family_Systems_Theory.aspxA detailed look at the family systems theory via the International Encyclopedia of Marriage andFamily.“A Stop Sign at the Intersection of History and Biography: Illustrating Mills’sImagination withDepression-Era Photographs” (2002. Hanson, C.Teaching Sociology)http://www.asanet.org/sites/default/files/savvy/introtosociology/Documents/TSHanson2002.pdfA paper by Chad Hanson, a member of the social science faculty at Casper College, proposingthat Depression-era photographs provide students with a visual counterpart to the perspectivesuggested by C. Wright Mills inThe Sociological Imagination.“Migrant Mother”http://www.asanet.org/sites/default/files/savvy/introtosociology/images/Sociology/8b29516vPeapickersHigherResolution.jpgDorothea Lange’s famous Depression-era photograph depicting a destitute migrant farm workerand several of her children in California in 1936.(See “A Stop Sign at the Intersection of Historyand Biography,” above.)

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1Chapter 3GENDER:The Meaningsof Masculinity & FemininityLearning ObjectivesAfter reading this chapter, students should be able to:3.1Compare and contrast sex, sex roles, gender, and gender roles.3.2Explain the four major theories of gender role socialization.3.3Identify and discuss the sources of gender role socialization.3.4Summarize the advantages and disadvantages of traditionalgender role socialization, andidentify and explain the impact ofsocial influences on gender roles.Major Questions You ShouldBe Able to Answer1.What are the principal terms anyone needs to know to discussgender differencesintelligently?2.What are some possible explanations for gender differences?3.Who has influenced how I feel about being a man or a woman?4.Is there more than one way to be masculine or feminine?On the WebHow Do the Mass Media Portray Masculinity & Femininity?Geena Davis Institute on Gender in Mediahttp://seejane.org/researchHow accurate do you think the mass media are in portraying men and women? Here’s anopportunity to go on the WorldWide Web to find out.The Geena Davis Institute on Gender inMedia, founded by actor and producer Geena Davis, is concerned with looking atgenderportrayals in the mass media.1.Go to the website “Research Informs and Empowers—See Jane.”2.Go to Key Findings/Executive Summaries.3.Click on one of the “Key Findings” that interests you. Do you think the gender portrayalstheydescribe are correct?Chapter OutlineI.3.1 Understanding Gender & Gender RolesTo talk about gender, you need to know the meaning of sex versus gender,of gender rolesand sex roles, and of socialization and gender identity. It helps tounderstandthe distinctionsamong cross-dressers, transvestites, transsexuals, transgenderists, andhermaphrodites.

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2Finally, you should know the vocabulary of sexism—patriarchal and matriarchal,sexism andsexual harassment.Major Question 3.1: What are the principal terms anyone needs to know to discussgender differences intelligently?A.How to Talk about Gender: The Vocabulary1.Sex2.Gender3.Roles, gender roles, & sex roles4.Socialization& gender identity5.Cross-dressers & transvestites6.Transsexuals &intersexualsB.NumbersThat Matter: Gender Differences1.Heterosexual males were found to be drawn to physically attractive young women,and heterosexual women were found to be drawn to men with economic ambitions.2.Males account for 70% of D and F grades and 80% of high school dropouts.3.Women’s and men’s work are divided.C.What Gender Are You?1.The concept of transgender2.LGBT becomes LGBTQIA. . .or even LGBTQQIAPD.Example of a Transgendered Person: Bruce Jenner Becomes Caitlyn JennerE.The Vocabulary of Sexism1.Patriarchal & matriarchal2.Sexism & sexual harassmentF.Practical Action: Preventing & Stopping Sexual Harassment1.Two types of sexual harassment: quid pro quo (tangible economic injury) and hostileenvironment (offensive work environment)2.Preventing sexual harassment3.Stopping sexual harassmentII.3.2 Why Do Gender Roles Differ? Some TheoriesFour theories that have been offered to account for gender differences aresociobiology,social learning theory, cognitive development theory, and gender schema theory.Major Question 3.2:What are some possibleexplanations for genderdifferences?A.Sociobiology: Does Biology Determine Our Gender Differences?B.Social LearningTheory: Does the Environment Determine Our Gender Differences?1.Twokinds oflearninga.Learning by reinforcement—Rewards and punishmentb.Learning by modeling—ImitationC.Cognitive Development Theory: Does Our Age Determine Our Gender Differences?1.Two-year-olds2.Five-year-olds3.Six-and seven-year-oldsD.Gender Schema Theory:Do We Develop Mental Categories for Organizing Our GenderPerceptions?

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